"Spoiler alert: 10/10 would recommend."

One of our team members recently decided to ditch dating (and the emotional admin that comes with it) in favour of a week-long love affair with her NIROBI Pro Rabbit vibrator — and let’s just say, the results were eye-opening. Here’s her anonymous, unfiltered take...

Let me set the scene: I’d had one too many disappointing dates, one too many “you up?” texts (when I absolutely wasn’t), and one too many Sunday scaries caused by mediocre shag regrets. So I made a bold, slightly dramatic decision: no men, no dating apps, no late-night flirty texts... just me, my vibrator, and a whole week of self-made magic.

Here’s what happened — and why this might be the glow-up you didn’t know you needed.

Day 1: The Detox Begins

I won’t lie, I half-expected withdrawal symptoms. No validation pings? No one to flirt with over oat milk lattes? But by bedtime, something magical happened. I reached for my favourite toy (a sleek, rose gold gem that knows all my buttons) and let the stress of the day melt away in waves. Literal waves.

I slept like a baby. A smug, well-satisfied baby.

Day 2: Rediscovering My Own Rhythm

Without the pressure to perform, impress, or decode someone else’s mixed signals, I started tuning into what I actually wanted. Fast or slow? Clit or g-spot? Vibrations or gentle pulses? The freedom to experiment — without anyone else in the room — was unexpectedly liberating.

Also, no need to fake it. Just sayin’.

Day 3: The Empowerment Hits

Something shifted. I strutted around the house in my robe like a goddess who knows she’s got orgasms on demand. Suddenly, I wasn’t craving someone else’s hands — I was obsessed with the idea that my own could give me everything I needed.

Hot girl energy? Fully activated.

Day 4: Getting Creative

I brought lube into the mix. I played with temperature. I took my NIROBI Pro Rabbit into the bath (safely — waterproof for the win). I even lit a candle and put on a playlist that was definitely made for slow dancing with yourself. Who knew solo sessions could be this… luxurious?

Day 5: No Awkward Small Talk, Just Orgasms

You know what I didn’t miss?
 Explaining my kinks
Wondering if my body looked “okay” in that angle
Post-nut weirdness

My toy didn’t ghost me. Didn’t interrupt the vibe. Didn’t finish and roll over. She’s consistent, quiet, and runs on USB. A literal dream.

Day 6: Clarity Hits Hard

Here’s the thing: I love connection. But I realised I’d been giving away pieces of myself — my energy, my pleasure — without getting much back. This week reminded me that I am my safest, sexiest investment. And pleasure doesn’t require permission.

Day 7: The Grand Finale (With a Happy Ending)

After a week of mind-blowing solo sessions, zero awkward DMs, and actual peace of mind, I felt... powerful. Grounded. Lit from within. And very, very satisfied.

So no, I didn’t swear off men forever. But I did raise the bar. If a partner can’t meet the level of love, attention, and orgasmic joy I can give myself? They’re not getting the invite.

Moral of the Story?

Trade the stress for self-love. Ditch the drama, not the desire. Whether it’s a full-on vibrator staycation or just one night of solo spoiling, your pleasure is sacred — and baby, you deserve the best.

💗 P.S. Want the toy that started this love affair? Have your own week of solo satisfaction with the NIROBI Pro Rabbit.